Did you ever ask your mom for advice in the dating department? I never did! When I was 12 I thought my mother was ancient and knew nothing! I wonder how our boys perceive us.
Surprise, surprise – I was flattered when our nearly 11-year old sunshine asked me in a roundabout way on how to date a girl! At least that’s what I believe was the question…
Here is what I told him:”Most of us girls don’t want a guy who is constantly away, working to earn a lot of money. We don’t want to get expensive presents, we rather have random hugs, kisses, a flower here and there, a few sweeties and attention. Instead of a big, fat diamond ring we want to go dancing instead.”
He gave me this wonderful, confused look, head tilted to the side, eyebrows raised. Yes I know, I just gave our 10 year old son full blown marital advice! It’s official, I am my mothers daughter, I didnt get it, missed the point completely.
Cruz is still at the beginning phase of the game. He hasn’t even talked to his girl yet and time is running out for him:two more months and the big summer break is upon us! All he wants to know is how to talk to the most popular girl in his class – alone! (He surely knows how to make his young life more challenging!)
If I wanted to save my credibility as advisor, I had to come up with something better, fast. My next practical advice was: “Why don’t you invite her to our house, you guys can hang out here and play some mindcraft.”
I was still missing the point and Cruz rendered me useless. He did the next best thing, he asked his dad for tips and tricks.
Here is what Dominic came up with: “Make a plan, be on it, be patient and remember, whatever happens, happens.”
What kind of advice is that? Our son needs a blueprint for success, not some kind of philosophical, universal, fits-all approach.
The sad truth is, we failed our son on his quest to touch base with Mrs. Popular. We should stay out of it and let the boy come up with his own plan of action. And he did: Cruz and his friend Conner googled How to get a girl-friend. Based on the youtube advice they decided the buddy – , or better, wing-man -system.would work best. The finer details of when or how still needs to be decided on,- but at least they have a plan. Good luck boys!